The Worst Fantasy Story (Ever)

Do you ever get tired of being under so much pressure to write well? I decided the heck with it. I’m going to write a bad story, using every tired, worn-out trope I can think of. What I came up with is below:

 

The Chosen One woke up in the morning. It was raining. The sky was gray. He got up from his bed, which was stuffed with goose feathers, and walked into the kitchen. His mother was cooking bacon and eggs. She even had a few sliced onions, which burned at the bottom of the skillet.

As he sat on a chair, his mother said, “I really wish you father hadn’t left home when you were three years old to join the Evil Alliance.”

A good wizard knocked at the door. The Chosen One answered it. “Hi, wizard.”

“Hi, Chosen One,” he said. “I need you to come with me because you’re the only one who can fight the evil wizard.”

“Wow! You mean I’m really magic?” Said the Chosen One.

“Yes, you are,” said the good wizard.

As the good wizard took the Chosen One through the village, a group of boys picked on the Chosen One and said, “We like to pick on you because you’re strange.”

“I’m strange because I have magic,” said the Chosen One and he turned the boys to lizards. “Wow! Did you see that?” He said to the good wizard. “This magic stuff really works.”

“You should only use your magic for good,” said the good wizard. He turned them back to boys.

“Now we can fight the evil wizard,” said the Chosen One.

“No,” said the good wizard. “First you have to sharpen your magic skills. See that tree over there? Burn it with a lightning bolt. And that rock back there?  Lift it with a levitation spell.”

The Chosen One did those things. “Cool!”

“Okay, now we can fight the evil wizard,” said the good wizard.

They walked through the forest until they found the evil wizard.

“The evil wizard looked at the Chosen One and said, “Hey! You’re my son, who I walked out on when you were three years old so I can join the Evil Alliance.”

“Hello, Dad,” said the Chosen One. “Would you like to join the Good Alliance?”

“Sure!” Said his father. “I’m tired of being an evil wizard.”

The Chosen One went home with his father and they lived happily ever after.

Then the boy’s alarm clock rang. His mother ran into his bedroom. “Time to get ready for school!”

“Darn!” Said the boy. “This had all been a dream.”

The End

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